Friday, October 9, 2009

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Mom vs America

Until I had a baby of my own I never realized how most of America is NOT child-friendly.
Of course, you get the crazy old ladies who swoon over your baby and TOUCH him in the store but ultimately I think most American's view children just as another annoying person to deal with only smaller. No one wants to sit next to the family with small children on an airplane or in a restaurant. Why are we so anti-children?

Case-in-point, today I took Jude, by myself, to eat at a local restaurant. It's the sort of place where you order at the counter and they call your number to come pick it at another counter. Well, as a mom there is alot of logistical planning involved with taking your small child out in public. Do I use a stroller? Can I balance a baby, diaper bag, drinks, and food in my two hands? Luckily, today I found a table near the pick-up window, drinks and trashcan. So I put Jude in the high chair, left him at the table and got my drink. I was literally only a few steps away but I got some odd looks from other adults. I didn't abandon my child I just needed to get my drink and if you're so concerned you could offer to help. I had to walk away from him two more times. Once to get our food and once to throw the trash away. The last time I overheard a group of diners discussing why there was this baby just sitting all by himself and what kind of parents would leave a child unattended. (I was only a few steps away disposing of my trash) Then they proceeded to give me dirty looks as I left the highchair at the table and the bits of food surrounding it on the ground. No thanks I don't need an extra hand I've got it all under control.

Now, I do try to do my part. I try to clean up after Jude as best I can. I try to keep him from getting too loud and obnoxious. But he is a baby and I think it should be accepted that he will ACT like a baby wherever we go.

8 comments:

Paige said...

That's very frustrating. I think times like this make me appreciate the struggle single parents must go through on a daily basis.

Stephanie Carroll said...

Jessica, I totally agree. It is very hard to eat at a restaurant with kids with only one adult. And, while we are very careful parents, walking two steps away to the trashcan, is not irresponsible. And, of course, you're right, the people staring could offer to help. Oh well. I really love your blog by the way. Jude is such a cutie!

Andrea said...

yes that is frustrating...part of why i finally got a BECO was so I could carry everything!

Andrea said...

Shame on those adults for not helping! What a sad testament to our society. On the other hand, I have been so impressed with the attitude toward children in Denmark. They are highly prized and cared for. It is common to see a father walking with a pram down the street without the mom, sometimes with more than one child. Also, it is very common for parents to leave a child in their pram outside a restaurant or store (stores are too small for a stroller, much less a pram) unattended. No one thinks anything of it. Kidnapping is unheard of here. As to your situation, it wasn't much different when my kids were little either, if that is any consolation. Still, we should be about loving our neighbor as ourselves and not judging them. Thank you for the post.

tammy said...

Sorry all you got was whispers and dirty looks! Hopefully your next outing will find you in a more helpful crowd!!

Just stopping by to say Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest. :)

Ann said...

I couldn't agree more! Very well said....it is such a shame that so many talk the talk about the value of children but so few will walk the walk.

Stopping by from SITS and I am a fellowing North Carolinian....I'm from the High Point area...nice to meet you!

Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest.

Amy said...

I know I had no idea what babies and small children were REALLY like until I had one. I think it's part of the idea that moms should have perfect children and perfectly manage them and everything else, etc etc.

It would have made me want to answer the whispers! If you can hear someone asking why the child is alone, I think it's perfectly fine to say, "he's not alone, I'm right here".

ashleystravel said...

I'm with Amy. I don't have any children, but I'd be inclined to say "Hello! I'm right here!"

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